Meg arrives at Sue’s London home acting nervously, up and down from her seat, fussing around the lounge, following Sue into the kitchen as she clears dishes, and intermittently looking out of the window for who knows what. It’s not till the evening, says Sue, that Meg finally settles by the fire, head on paws, looking into the flames.
Dogs Trust – the country’s biggest dog welfare charity – always finds its charges a little anxious when they are rehomed. But, as they long for love and attention, any nervous energy is usually directed with delight into hours of games in the garden or long walks around the new territory they can call home.
Dogs such as Meg, though, are different. She’s not in the mood for games. And one would imagine she’s not really wanting a new owner. She is loved in an extraordinary way by her current one. But Meg is at Sue’s house today because her owner has been the victim of domestic abuse. Unable to take Meg with her to a refuge, she has not felt she could escape her abuser. Until now.
The Dogs Trust Freedom Project offers victims of domestic abuse – and their pets – a way out. When someone who is being abused goes into a refuge, the charity finds their pet a temporary retreat with a foster carer such as Sue. Weeks or months later, when the abuse victim has a new home, dog and owner are reunited.
Set up 12 years ago with the backing of Refuge and Women’s Aid, the Freedom Project recognises that dogs have been caught in the middle of abusive relationships and are often used by the abuser for coercive control – becoming the subject of emotional threats that usually suggest the dog will be harmed if the abuse victim leaves the house. “We know victims are often unable to admit what is going on, never mind being able to call on friends or family to help. They become isolated and feel trapped,” explains Amy Hyde, the Freedom Project coordinator.
The charity also knows the scale of the problem. While it has been able to help more than 1,200 dogs in London, Hertfordshire and Yorkshire (Es....... has just been added to the list), Women’s Aid says that, on average, police across the UK receive an emergency call relating to domestic abuse every 30 seconds.
In many cases, physical violence extends to the dog too. While campaigns (from Refuge’s 1in4Women to the domestic violence “gaslighting” storyline on Radio 4’s The Archers) have helped to put a spotlight on what happens to victims of domestic abuse, the effects on pets (witnessing the violence or being abused themselves) still goes largely unnoticed. But research shows that mistreatment of pets is often part of domestic abuse, and that a high level of pet abuse is committed in the presence of the victim as revenge or to control. Dogs Trust sees animals that have been beaten with their own lead, starved, choked or thrown against walls in homes where there is abuse. After their escapes, many owners tell the charity of how their pets tried to protect them, jumping between them and their abuser, one dog grappling a knife out of the hands of a man and so saving his owner’s life. Every time, these animals demonstrate the kind of love and loyalty that is hard to leave behind, however desperate an owner is to escape.
“The stories we hear of dogs’ bravery are heartbreaking,” says Sue. “But it’s the love the owner has shown the dogs that moves me most. If it was one of my daughters, I’d want them to leave no matter what, but these owners – mostly women – have stayed in a desperate situation because they fear for their dog. It feels like a complete privilege to be here for that woman and to look after the animal she loves while she gets back on her feet.”
“Foster carers like Sue expect the dog to be nervous and often scared of men,” explains Hyde. “We warn them that simple gestures like picking up a lead might be seen as a threat, rather than an invitation to walk and that as a result of what the dogs have been through, there may be issues – such as toileting – for the first few days. But the carers always say it’s the dogs who do take longer to settle that they love even more. It’s rewarding for them to see the dog come to trust people again and grow in confidence.”
“The first dog we fostered was really stressed,” says Sue. “Sam was a gorgeous labrador and would jump if you picked up a brush to sweep the floor. The first time we left him, we came home to find he’d soaked everything, tipping his water bowl over himself apparently and shaking all over the room.”
Another foster dog, a collie, didn’t settle at night, says Sue. “We could hear her paws tap-tap-tapping on our wooden floors as she walked around the house. She wanted to sleep with my daughter, head on her pillow and everything.” While Sue never meets or knows much about the owners, she’s allowed to communicate news of their pet via the Dogs Trust and, if she has worries, knows the charity is always contactable (its staff take the dogs to the foster homes, then visit regularly).
“The dogs soon settle,” says Sue. “After a couple of days, that labrador, Sam, was on my lap, head on my shoulder like a baby and fast asleep. He didn’t understand the concept of personal space. I remember thinking, sitting there, that there was so much I should be getting on with. But I didn’t want to move. I was in awe of how resilient he was after all he’d been through. He was lovely.
“My husband, Jason, is a big man and we always introduce dogs to him outside the house, and give them space and time to get used to him. He pretends to be less interested – you know, rolling his eyes when I say we’re fostering again. But then I come in and he’s cuddled up on the sofa with them, and I know he loves what we’re doing, too. Meg’s our third, and we’ve had no aggression from any of them. They want love. Just a lot of love.”
Sue admits it’s hard to let the dogs go. She says she answered an ad for fostering in response to her daughters – now 13, 16 and 18 – begging her for a dog. “We feel all the benefits of having a dog while helping someone else,” she says. “It’s hard to say goodbye, but our whole family is behind what we’re doing, and understand why we’re doing it. We know this has been and still is another woman’s best friend in every sense of the word. They mean the world to each other. The dog is just ours on loan.”
The owners often tell Dogs Trust they worry their pets won’t remember them. “But that never happens,” says Hyde. “Dogs might take a few minutes to clock what’s going on when they’re reunited – it’s like they’re pinching themselves it’s for real – but then they’re back in their owner’s arms. That will be Meg’s happy ending any time soon. It is always a great moment.”